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Title: Chinese Women! Please don't go to bed with foreigners! (Original text found at: http://tieba.baidu.com/f?kz=1001175283)
If you ask a foreigner, why do you come to China?
He1 will most likely reply saying that it is because he likes China's long history, splendid culture, amazing landscapes, the high speed of development, or the great changes that China is going through.
But I will tell you, aside from a minority that are in China due to their government or those that are placed here by a company, being types that are held back by their own family, the great majority fall under the following two categories:
First, those that didn't do very well at home or just failed to make it;
Second, those that are looking for Chinese girls.
One day at lunchtime I was with a friend when a French girl came back out from eating. As she arrived at the company's entrance, far in the distance she saw and old geezer collecting garbage and pulling along a little cart. At this point the young French lady asked me, "Did you see?" "See what?" I said, confused. "Just right in front of you." I discovered that the old geezer across from me was a foreigner with a bent back, with only a few hairs left on his head, fat and unkempt. No wonder I shortsightedly thought that it was someone collecting garbage. The little cart that he was pushing didn't have other people's garbage, but it was a mixed-blood child. There was a young Chinese lady at his side. A young, pretty, tall Chinese lady.
The French girl laughingly said: "What are you Chinese girls thinking?" The reason why the French girl was laughing was because while we had just been eating we were talking about this problem. Actually, I had previously seen and heard stories about this kind of foreign man and Chinese women. I had never really taken it to heart before, but before my eyes the contrast between this couple was too intense-- A Chinese girl who was like a flower, like jade2 with an old, ugly, fat, short, bald, shriveled foreign man, and who had his child in the little push-cart.
Beside me, the French girl bent over with laughter (I don't know why she was laughing like that). At that moment, my self-respect as a Chinese person suffered greatly.
Several days later, I made three decisions: First, I would know about that kind of ugly foreign man and tell everyone the real facts. Second, because of this I would mobilize Chinese people to rise up and to prevent Chinese girls from latching onto foreign men. Third, and also most importantly, was that I would be a scholar of China, I decided to temporarily interrupt my regular job so that I could put all my heart into something that no one had yet researched. That is, to research foreign women's views of Chinese men, there by helping Chinese men to pursue foreign women.
My colleague and I first will go to interview some of the white women3 that live in China yet whom have never yet had a Chinese boyfriend to investigate the main reasons. Even more, we wanted to go interview white women whom had previously had Chinese boyfriends and married Chinese men to ask them to tell us about the merits and shortcomings of Chinese men. I know that this kind of foreigner is not numerous, but fortunately I have already ran into a few.
We also wanted to conduct a investigative questionnaire for foreign women living in China (all of them white people), utilizing scientific survey methods, in the end this drew out the image that foreign women hold of Chinese men. We also found the five most attractive things about Chinese men in the views of these foreign women. Therefore this research will be able to answer the following questions:
What are foreign women's feelings towards Chinese men? What do single foreign women in China for wish for from a Chinese man? How can Chinese men increase their attractiveness towards foreign women? Chinese men with what characteristics receive the most attention from foreign women? How does one get to know a foreign woman? How does one hit on a foreign women in common situations? When did China become a foreign man's heaven?
John is just this kind of example. Not long ago I ran into him on the street. A young Chinese lady half a head taller than him was holding his hand. As an introduction, he said that his Chinese girlfriend worked at a modeling company. In fact, if John hadn't called out to me that time I really wouldn't have recognized him, because there was a night and day difference from that last time that I had seen him.
John is an American, 42 years old, 1.67 meters tall4. He hasn't graduated from college, and in the United States he has never had a regular job. After hanging out in Africa for two years, he heard stories of Americans making money in China, so he came to Shanghai. When he first arrived in Shanghai everything was unfamiliar, so he just had to go to a small city's school in Jiangsu to be an English teacher.
John didn't resign himself to that; he lived in Jiangsu for several months and then returned to Shanghai to look for work, living in a 12-yuan-a-day hotel. That is when I met him. That day I went to look for a foreign friend of mine to eat lunch with and I saw them talking together. Since she knew John, I called out to her. Only afterward did I learn that they were strangers who had just met by chance and nothing more.
While order food, John ordered a fairly expensive dish. My friend used English to ask him "You've ordered a pretty expensive dish. Do you have the money to pay for that?" John immediately appeared like a small child who has done something wrong, hurriedly wanting to fade away into the background. Looking at his shrunken back appearance, I first used Chinese to tell me friend that it was nothing, then I used English to tell John that it was okay, and to keep ordering.
Afterward, because of work I had to go somewhere, and I quickly forgot about John. When I saw him this next time, he told me that he found work as an English teacher in a school in Shanghai. I hadn't spoken to John's girlfriend, but I could see that she already had a contemptuous view of Chinese people. My memory of her faded into the background; I couldn't bear to think of her. She certainly didn't know how at that time her American John was relying on other people to eat. This unavoidably resembled a story of gods: clearly of humankind's own manufacturing, and after one has created a god one goes to worship it.
Also, when I was on a public bus, I saw first hand a typical little American street huddle, (an American man) embracing a young Chinese woman, in broad daylight, putting his hand from beneath to stretch through her clothes to feel her chest. Furthermore , it was very obvious that the young Chinese woman really wanted to express the pleasure of having her chest groped by a foreigner. What a pity that her English was so poor that every time she spoke she could at most only two words.
A taxi driver told me that one time he picked up a black person on a famous bar street. He was embracing a Chinese girl with both hands. At first he thought that a girl from that area was doing a special kind of job5, and he didn't bother with it anymore. The driver had a big shock when the passengers had the taxi stop in front of the gates of a female graduate student dormitory of a well known university.
It is reported that there is a famous AIDS patient at a certain Beijing hospital. Just before dying, this American business man confessed that in the short nine weeks he had been in Beijing he has already had sexual relations with six Chinese women. An investigation discovered they were all high class intellectuals.
In China, groups of foreigners who live like this can't find work in their own countries and rely on foreigners' economic advantage in China's to easily make money, get drunk in public, and chase girls. Basically, their only spare-time hobby is just criticizing China. Furthermore, some diplomats use their position to wantonly trick and to fool around with Chinese women. Some people even publicly say "My signature can get any Chinese woman."
China, do you know? You have given foreigners far too much. Now many foreigners have come to look down upon you with contempt. Many foreigners themselves disapprove of this and call it white trash. Here I want to rightfully tell those foreigners not to be too pleased with themselves: you have only gotten Chinese women's physical bodies, not the soul's form.
Recently online a joke about a foreigner looking for marriage has been circulating: a 47 year old foreigner is looking for a partner in a marriage park in China.6 A long time passed with nobody making inquiries. And then one day, a great number of letters arrived from people looking for a partner. This foreigner was really surprised. Afterward he investigated, and found out that it was because the workers at the marriage park had inadvertently written his age incorrectly as 67.
One thing that investigating marriage with foreigners also confirms is that Chinese women primarily do not marry foreigners for love. Investigations discovered that Chinese women and foreign grooms on average have an age difference of 10.5 years, which includes 13% of the couples which are from two different generations with fully 20 years of age difference. It is reported that marriage between foreigners and Chinese, the record is currently a sensational couple with an age difference of 54 years. At the time of marriage, the American groom was already an old man of 82 years, while the Chinese bride was only 28.
As luck would have it, not long ago I saw a joke in an American magazine: an old man of more than 80 years accompanied his pregnant twenty something year old wife to the hospital for an examination. The doctor kindly inquired if perhaps there was some other possibility. The old man denied this, saying "No, I always creates miracles. Last time my wife and went hunting with her boyfriend I only had to take an umbrella in my hand and point it at a deer, then that deer was just struck dead by a bullet."7
Unknowingly that Chinese young woman not long after announced the news of her pregnancy, which made everyone truly appreciate the miracle between people. Perhaps you could obtain a bit of something, but on the other hand you would lose your most precious dignity.
It doesn't need to be said that the first party to do wrong with these ugly foreigners is the Chinese women. But most of these women have never gone abroad and their minds of brimming with fantasies. Therefore, today I want to use this opportunity to tell them about the real facts. If you have found true love then I congratulate you and wish you well. I believe that it only needs to be true love, then no matter how long lasting or how short it can all be worth going to pursue.
Despite this, I still want to warn you. First, Chinese women are mostly after a steady marriage. However, aside from an exceedingly small number of exceptions, the divorce rate of western developed countries is around 50%8, and the factors that contribute to instability in an international marriage are even more.
Next, I highly doubt that today's foreign men will give true love to Chinese women. On account of the prerequisite for true love being respect, while in the eyes of foreign men Chinese women's image has already begun to be greatly tarnished by a small minority, they have already turned into: the world's most open9, most bold, possessing of ulterior motives, simple minded, lacking in knowledge, foolish, easy girls. It is hard to imagine a man that would invest true love in this kind of woman. There is only one kind of exception, an American said, and that is the kind of foreigner that takes an Asian wife as a three-in-one deal: a cook, a slave, and a sex worker.
Perhaps you only do it for money. I can understand that, and I won't stop you. But before you make a big commitment I want to tell you to be sure of two things: first, be sure that this foreigner really has money, because I know that most of the foreigners in China actually don't have very much money. Second, be sure that he actually intends to marry you, because if you don't marry than you won't have any ties at all to his property.
Perhaps your reason is to go out of the country. I won't prevent you from going after this, either. But, again, before you make a big commitment I want to tell you to keep in mind these two things: first, make sure that this foreigner really wants to return to his own country. Foreign countries, despite being richer than us, are by no means heaven. The frustrating thing is that many of the foreigners in China don't even want to return to their home country, because in their own country they can't find a good job, they can't even find any job. They also absolutely don't want to return to living such a petty, lonely life. Second, make sure that he intends to marry you. Because without marriage you will be unable to get permanent residence in his country.
A coworker's neighbor has a daughter that married a Japanese peasant from a mountainous region. The neighbor often jokingly says things like "Now I don't worry about money. 100 thousand, even 200 thousand is small change to me," in front of my coworker. However, Mr. Neighbor, do you know if your daughter is really happy in Japan? Chinese people desperately want face, so they will always report back about happiness and never tell anyone about hardship. A number of years ago a Chinese television station went to the villages in mountainous areas of Japan specifically to gather news on the Chinese brides there. From the great flourishing, bustling Shanghai to the lonely and remote mountain strongholds, I heard that the Chinese brides were disappointed, full of despair, and felt helpless.
Perhaps it is for the sex? There is a European lady Mrs. Shi who wrote an article saying, "I have a girlfriend who in China is considered quite open, a women with abundant sexual experience. However, the first time she slept with a western man, she got a big shock. She gave me an account of this over the telephone, and she suddenly thought that she should marry that western man. Counter to what one might expect, I calmly told her 'western men who are great in bed are everywhere. Out of every ten westerners, eight are great in bed and two are just okay. Of Chinese men, two out of ten are just okay, and the other eight are really terrible.'"
As Mrs. Shi's "two out of ten" article came out, there was immediately an explosion of response, and masses of Chinese men responded, defending themselves. This subject unexpectedly lasted for several months in the local newspapers. The heated argument even caught the attention of international media. It was easy to see that this subject was incredibly damaging to Chinese men.
Mrs. Shi's "two out of ten" is her own personal experience, or is it the overall feeling that many women have from their experiences? This is impossible to know. I undertook an investigation to see if Chinese men are competent or not in this respect.
I didn't investigate Chinese women that had married western men, but on the contrary, I investigated women who were married to Chinese men, or white women who had formerly had Chinese boyfriends. I asked them straightforwardly, how are Chinese men in bed? They also told me directly, "Very good. Some would even qualify as 'perfect.'" Some people heard me ask this question and their first response was "Chinese men don't show confidence in their own performance in bed?"
I should investigate still more. After the detailed research has finished I will make it all public.
I still want to tell everyone, the latest sexual research clearly indicates that a woman's degree of sexual satisfaction in bed does not depend on the man for the most part, but rather it depends on the women herself. This piece of research discovered that is females' sexuality is low, this is primarily due to her own deep psychological restrictions. If only a woman can sufficiently break away from these restrictions, they will be able to have the same intensity of responses that men have. Their physiological demands will even surpass those of men. On the basis of this piece of research, the reason that Mrs. Shi's friend felt such a shock in her first time sleeping with a western man in mainly due to how she was unconsciously throwing off her former psychological shackles.
The latest research has also revealed that the reaction that men and women have to sex is actually quite similar. For instance, previously it was always thought that men reacted more to visual stimulation, while mood, atmosphere, and the tone of the encounter caused the greatest reaction in women. This idea was also used to explain why men enjoyed watching pornography. However, recently British scientists have discovered that pornography is capable of arousing men and women equally. Many women can rely on nothing more than the visual stimulation of movies to reach a high level of sexual arousal.
Of course, Chinese men in this situation are not without responsibility. But I can tell everyone that the problem of Chinese men is not primarily physiological, but is rather mental. What is the biggest problem for Chinese men? Lack of sexual skill. The eight out of ten western men who are great in bed are supported from behind by marriage and sexual counseling, availability of health clinics, an open attitude toward sexuality, and the way in which they seek out expert advice when they have questions or problems. To bring up an inappropriate analogy, the cooking skill of an old lady that has been burning dished all her life will never match that of a young cook; we can easily see how important the specialized training is.
Translators Notes:
1Although both male and female foreigners are present in China, there is a general perception that there are more male foreigners than there are female foreigners. This article mentions both, but it is often implied that only males are the subject when the term “foreigner” is used.
2Jade is a culturally important substance in China, often representing beauty, grace and purity. Jade is commonly seen as more precious than gold.
3In the original Chinese text the term here used is 白人女性, which means white female. Although non-white foreigners exist in China, there is a view of white people being the most numerous. The standard image of a foreigner in China is often a white person. I, personally, do not know if statistically there are more white foreigners in China than non-white foreigners.
4Approximately five feet five inches. It is possible the author mentions John's height as an insult, or as a negative quality. Height is still considered to be a fairly important trait in dating in China, and while in Beijing I heard the phrase 高必衰重要, meaning “being tall is more important than being handsome.”
5Although illegal, prostitution is widely practiced in China, and many women earn either their primary money through prostitution or supplement their income with it. It is not unusual for white collar workers or college students to work at massage parlors or KTV parlors to earn extra money. I have even seen “part-time college students” specifically advertized on the business cards for call-out massage services. Foreigners in particular are often propositioned by prostitutes, due to the perception of foreigners as both rich and as having large amount of sexual energy.
6Single people wishing to find a marriage partner often make use of public spaces, often certain areas in parks or plazas, to put up advertisements about themselves in order to look for a marriage partner. These advertisements will include the basic statistics of a person, such as name, education, age, height, and income. This functions similarly to online dating sates except without the internet. The parents of the eligible individuals often spend time in these parks to act as an agent for the child, and it is not unusual for the parents to arrange meetings for the children through other parents who are present at the park.
7The joke was poorly translated into Chinese, which means that the re-translation into English, while true to the source document, is nonsensical. The English version of the joke goes something like this: An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up... The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said, “Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. So what do you think about that Doc?" To which the doctor replies: “Let me tell you a story. A hunter in a hurry grabs an umbrella instead of the gun. He moves into the jungle, sees a lion, lifts the umbrella, pulls the handle and… BANG… The lion drops dead!” The old man responds, “That's impossible; someone else must have shot the lion,” at which point the doctor says, “MY POINT EXACTLY!”
8Although the divorce rate in the U.S. is commonly thought to be quite high, statistics for Canada, UK and other European countries vary widely, some higher and some lower than the U.S. figure. The author's claim could be taken as part of the general tendency to see the United States as representative of “the west.”
9While the concept of being open (such as open-minded) usually carries a positive meaning in English, in Chinese the phrase for open (开放) usually implies sexual openness, promiscuity, and generally loose sexual mores. It is open used in a negative sense when describing people.
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